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Where is David?

   Hey you guys, it has been a while since we last talked. I feel like the last time I wrote was maybe mid February, maybe, maybe not. To catch you up SUMMER17' is officially about to kick in, with my last week of junior year flying by. I was walking out of the doors that lead to the bus lot today when I started to think about the summer. How this whole year I was saying "Summer 17' will be mine" but, funny thing is I said the same thing last year and the year be for that, and the one before that, and so on. I mean you get the idea right? Yeah, pretty sure you do. I began thinking why I haven't experienced a summer worthwhile yet. You know like the ones in the movies where the girl typically meets a guy who helps her out of her comfort zone? If you didn't this is pretty much a quote on quote description of ENDLESS LOVE which was the movie of the summer last year. So, yes I am pretty much comparing myself to a fictional character in a book, but only because we have a lot of similarities. I swear I find similarities in everyone, and their mommas'. Long story short Jade Butterfield, typical high school nerd who always kept her head in the books finally graduates and feels like she can breathe. During the graduation she runs into one of her semi-popular classmates David when she asked him to sign her yearbook. Need I remind you not this is NOT a movie review I just thought I'd give you a brief summary of the movie I am referring to. Jade ends up throwing a graduation party and David helps to basically bring the whole school to her house. Hence the party is where their love story begins. Throughout the movie when Jade is with David she feels alive she is the most happiest. So, in some aspects I feel as though I am Jade. I am not living, well I am due to my heart pumping blood and all but, I am not really living. I need my David to make me feel alive.
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    To me David represents more than a boyfriend, but more so happiness. It's like the reason you continue to wake up in the morning with the same grin everyday as if the day has yet to change. It's the feeling a kid gets at the sound of a ice cream truck. It's the smile that appears on a teenage males' face when he sees a new pair of sneakers dropped. Happiness is not easy to achieve and there is no manual script on how to do so. We have all experienced or met someone who experienced 'Fake Happiness'. It's everywhere you go. I'm sorry to say but happiness can not be bought it's genuine meaning you must really feel it to experience it. It's sad that you can be asked if you're happy and you have to fake a smile and lie to to make yourself believe it too. It's okay to not be okay. It's okay to not know what to do next, or where to go...... IT'S OKAY! I promise you, you will be better off accepting that you're not happy now then faking it later. Happiness is not something you can achieve with a puff or a pill. Yes, you may feel like you're happy but it's only due to your mind compensating for what it's missing. You get what you give. David begins when you are real with yourself, when you listen to your conscious and you understand what you're in need of. Don't look for David in food, or clothes, or people.....matter of fact don't look for it in anything but YOURSELF. David has been there all along and I'm pretty sure he/she has been waiting to come out for along time now. Why don't you give David the spotlight now?

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